Wisecracks

- A fly in the soup is better than no meat at all
- A short waiter makes the steaks look bigger
- Food nowadays is so expensive, it's cheaper to eat money
- It's better to have hair in your soup than soup in your hair
- Absent friends makes the liquor last longer
- Anybody who wakes up and finds himself famous hasn't been asleep
- Be thankful you are not an elephant with sinus trouble
- Before marriage a girl has to kiss her man to hold him; after marriage she has to hold him to kiss him
- Better be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt:-)

I am Vata

Elements : ether and air
Climate : dry and cold
Principle : movement
Emotions : fearful, anxious, apprehensive, sensitive, timid, lacking confidence, slightly nervous,
changeable

Systems most affected by excess Vata : the nervous system and also the colon
Symptoms of excess Vata : flatulence, back pain, problems with circulation, dry skin, outbreaks of arthritis, constipation and nerve disorders

Vata types are known to be rather restless, cool people, who certainly notice the cold. When you have excess levels of Vata, fear, depression and nervousness become quite marked, significant traits, and with repressed emotions comes a definite weakening of the immune system. However, by adopting the appropriate lifestyle, and making one or two changes, you will create a better balance within yourself, and find that you achieve much more.

The Vata body type is usually thisn and narrow. Vatas do not gain weight easily and are often restless by nature, especially when they are busy and active. They have dry hair and cool skin and a tendency to feel the cold. Their level of energy are erratic, and they have to be very careful not to exhaust themselves, leading to inconsistency. They may find it quite hard to relax, which can lead to an overactive mind and insomnia.

Vata symptoms will be changeable, being cold by nature and therefore worse in cold weather. Any pain will worsen during change. Vata people can suffer from wind, low back pain, arthritis and nerve disorders. Vata types, because of their individual restless nature, certainly require a regular intake of nourishment, and they should sit down to eat or drink at regular times. Careful exercise should always be taken in moderation, clearly maintaining a gentle, regular, well-worked out routine that will help to keep the mind focused, and in perfect harmony with the body.

ps: is He a Pitta or Kapha?

Herbalism

All over the world, people have used plants not only as food but also as medicines. Traditional knowledge of herbal remedies used to be passed from generation to generation, but nowadays this is rare.

Fortunately, the countryside still produces wonderful herbs and many can be grown in the garden. Getting to know the plants growing around you can be a relaxing pleasure in itself. If you learn about their various properties, you can use them to help you feel more healthy and better able to cope with everyday problems. Very simple remedies can easily be made from dried or fresh herbs, and substituting and excellence herb tea for stimulating drinks such as tea. coffee and cola will help you to relax and reduce your tension levels.

Herbs, like people, are complex and variable organic structures. Each plant contains many different constituents which together give a unique taste and range of actions. Particularly active constituents have been isolated and copied by pharmacist to produce medicines such as aspirin. However using the whole plant has a much more subtle effect, and generates far fewer side effects. Herbalists therefore prefer to use the whole plant to treat the whole person. We are all unique and react to life in different ways; just as we all have special preferences for various foods, each of us responds best to particular herbs.

The Photos

Homeopathy and Health

Homeopathy is not only an energy medicine, it is also holistic. Homeopaths convincingly argue that the body is much more than the sum of its various parts, and that the mind, the emotions and indeed the organs are somehow intricately interconnected. Consequently, the tratments they give more "rounded"then those found in traditional medicine. They are not just aimed at the symptom, but at the whole person.

Energy Within

The mechanics of this interconnection are elaborate and hard to explain, but is clear than the process really does work. The key point is that underlying the physical and mental system of the body is a refined system of energy which is self-regulating. It generally works extremely well. You sense it in action when you become ill. We usually get better even without taking a medicine. The body heals itself though it might need support when its own natural energy is low.

Treatment

The healing process is like running a car. Modern cars are so efficient that, provided you maintain them properly, give them the right fuel and drive them sensibly, problems seldom arise. Then one night you forget to turn off the lights and the next morning the battery is flat and your car incapacitated. The only way to get it moving again - the only cure - is to get transfer of energy, in the form of a jump start from another battery. Homeopathy is in many ways just like getting a energizing jump start.

Homeopathy is becoming increasingly popular because of the serious concerns about drugs-based orthodox medicine. Many drugs are toxic and the side-effects are not observable, the long-term consequences from the excessive use of drugs are not always fully appreciated. In fact modern medicine seldom cures, and it does not even pretend to. What it does do is alleviate and palliate the symptoms, and manage the illness, but since it addresses the symptoms and rarely the cause, the results are not entirely satisfactory.

Homeopathy is different because it is safe and it does not treat the removal of symptoms as an end in itself. Symptoms are considered as signs of distress or adjustment. The correct remedy removes the cause of the problem;the symptoms will then fade away. Homeopathy is highly rated because it takes into account the nature of the person. It knows that when two people have been diagnosed as having the same illness, they can actually become ill in quite different remedies to effect a satisfactory cure.

Defining Disease

We become ill when our energy is depleted or when we are out of harmony in fact the word "disease"could be more written "dis-ease", indicating that we are definitely not at ease, and for disease to be cured it is not necessary to give it a name. To cure homeopathically depends on a sensitive, accurate analysis of the symptoms. There is usually no need for a diagnosis, for it is widely said that there are no diseases, only what might be called people who are "dis-ease".

Symptoms

Except for any life-threatening situations, symptoms are not the primary problem. They reflect a picture which shows how the system is making adjustment to heal itself. For example, both diarrhoea and vomiting are the body's way of ridding itself of unwanted "material", and the intolerable itching of eczema does not specifically mean that you have a skin disease. Rather it means that there is an imbalance in your whole system, and that your body is pushing the problem to the safest possible place, well away from the essential organ. The skin becomes an organ of elimination.

Treating the Whole Person

Some people are very robust and seldom become ill, others are over-sensitive and become run-down and sick after a slight chill or an emotional upset. For some, the chest is the greatest weakness : winter cold quicklyturn to bronchitis. With others digestion is the problem : the slightest unusual change to their diet causes an immediate upset. Homeopathy acknowledge these many differences and adjust all treatments accordingly. The professional homeopath will always prescribe "constitutionally"to try to strengthen the weak areas, as well as the whole system.

Ayurveda

What is Ayurveda?

It may be little known - and remarkably few people seem to have heard of it - but ayurveda is a highly respected, highly revered ancient form of learning which has an amazing amount to teach us. It brings peace of body and mind. Important ways of seeing the world and your own place in the scheme of things, and highly practical, sensible ideas when it comes to medicine, diet and ways of staying calm and relaxed.

The Origins of Ayurveda

The Origin of Ayurveda are uncertain. It is recounted that thousands of years ago, men of wisdom or rishis (meaning seers) as they are known in India, were saddened by the suffering of humanity. They knew that ill health and short lives allowed man little time to consider his spirituality and to commune with the divine - with God.

In the Himalayan mountains they prayed hard and meditated together, calling upon God to help them to relieve the plight of man, and God felt moved by compassion and gave them the essential teachings that would enlighten them in the ways of healing illness, and thereby alleviate and remove all suffering on the earth.

It is believed that these teachings are the Vedas, although this cannot be proven, due to the lack of historical records. A book called the Atharva Veda was one of the first detailed accounts of the system. From this, and perhaps other ancient writings, came the beginning of Ayurvedic medicine, which has developed, changed and absorbed many other influences over hundreds of years to become what it is today. Due to the invasions of India over the years, and the subsequent suppression of many original Indian ways of life, several ancient textshave been lost or even destroyed, but enough have survived to ensure the active continuation of these highly valued, greatly respected teachings.

Ayurveda is now acknowledge as the traditional healing system of India. It comes from two sanskrit words, ayur meaning "life" and veda, meaning "knowing", and can be interpreted as meaning the "science of life". The oldest healing system to remain intact, it is very comprehensive and has influenced many healing systems around the world.

The Influence of Ayurveda

For centuries after the end of the Vedic era, Ayurvedic medicine developed into a comprehensive healing system. Its philosophy and tehniques soon spread far and wide to China, Arabia, Persia and Greece, gradually influencing Middle Eastern, Greek and Chinese methods of healing. It is well known that ayurvedic practitioners reached the ancient city of Athens, and it can be noted that the traditional Greek folk medicine, based upon the bodily humours (characteristics), is significantly similar to Ayurveda. In turn, Greek medicine strongly influenced the subsequent development of what we call traditional or orthodox Western medicine. However, it is much too dificult to say exactly how much or to what degree the medical philosophy of ayurveda was indeed influential, or even how much Ayurveda influenced current techniques.

Crazy Jokes

Did you ever take your girl through the tunnel of love?
No, I'm afraid of the dark.

Did you meet your son at the station?
Oh, no, I've known him for years.

Do these stairs take you to the second floor?
No, you'll have to walk

Before I take this job, tell me, are the hours long?
No, only sixty minutes

Please don't spit on the floor
Why not? Does it leak?

So, your birthday is June 10th. What year?
Every year!

That's a nice house you bought. But where is the door?
Are you planning to go somewhere?

I heard your wife had her face lifted.
Yes, but it didn't take. When the doctor gave her the bill, it fell again

I heard your wife is expecting again
Yes, she's expecting a new coat, a new car, and a new ring

I heard your wife ran away with your best friend?
Yes, and am going to miss him!

Love makes the world go round
So does a couple of martinis

I keep hearing the world idiot. I hope you're not referring to me?
Don't be so conceited, as if there were no other idiots in the world

I wish you would stop buying so many things on credit
But, dear, it only proves that I have confidence in you

I would die for you
How soon?

I saw Tim today and he didn't even greet me. He probably thinks I'm not his equal
Why that stupid, brainless, conceited moron. You are certainly his equal.