Wisecracks

- A fly in the soup is better than no meat at all
- A short waiter makes the steaks look bigger
- Food nowadays is so expensive, it's cheaper to eat money
- It's better to have hair in your soup than soup in your hair
- Absent friends makes the liquor last longer
- Anybody who wakes up and finds himself famous hasn't been asleep
- Be thankful you are not an elephant with sinus trouble
- Before marriage a girl has to kiss her man to hold him; after marriage she has to hold him to kiss him
- Better be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt:-)